Wine Labels - On a lighter
Note
Due to increasing products liability
litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the Food and
Drug Administration's (FDA) suggestion that the following warning
labels be placed immediately on all containers:
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may make you think you are whispering when you
are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may cause you to tell your friendsover and over again that you love
them.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you
to think you can sing.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really
dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may make you think you can logically converse
with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu
powers.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may create the illusion that you are tougher,
smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
believe you are invisible.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol
may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum,
whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
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