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Wine Labels - On a lighter Note

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the Food and Drug Administration's (FDA)  suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friendsover and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people  are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

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